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gottaBKD

Reason, Season or a Lifetime.

Posted by gottabkd on Sunday, May 27, 2007

People come into our lives, all through our lives, for one of three instances.
A reason, a season or a lifetime .

The thing is, no one looks at it from that perspective. What is the reason for this relationship? What do they/me/we bring to the table and why is it you/me/them and not someone else? We tend to say “What do they want from me” and not “What can I offer.”

Conversely when people leave our lives there is usually some form of negativity surrounding the loss; they weren’t really my type, they didn’t make enough moolah, they didn’t like my friends, their hair was the wrong colour. Whatever it is, it is often negative.
But what if you flipped the coin and really tried to figure out why they came into your life in the first place? Was it a reason, season, or a lifetime ?

So let’s take a look:

When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person or perhaps what that person is there to do for you.

A reason: these people are those of passing. Passing through to help you learn the lessons of life. Some are teachers, though not always in the professional sense, but people with whom you learn something. Some are camp buddies or college friends. You know these kind. These could be acquaintances, in many different forms, but they are there for a reason, one that you have yet to learn.
Or after they leave they are the ones you look back and say “Wow, that person helped me learn this lesson. I’m glad they came at the right time.” Or you might say… “remember when we did…. wasn’t that great?”
When someone is in your life for a reason, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They may have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are but you must recognize that they are there for the reason you need them to be the one you expressed.

These types may be around for a long time or a short time or just a good time, but whatever length of time it is, its for a reason .

A season: the are people who come around and stay for awhile. Either because you want them to, they choose to, or they just won’t go away. However, like the ones for a reason, they too are here for a purpose a reason. Probably because it is your time to share and grow or learn, but the time period is for a season.
Let’s say your going through something, and they have a similar experience. They are there for the season of that experience. The time it takes you to go through it or learn the lesson. Or let’s say you are trying to learn a new skill, they have the knowledge to impart upon you and once done, the season is over. They move on to the next to be with them for a season .

A lifetime: these are the ones that are there for the long haul. Through thick and thin, the good the bad and the ugly. You probably have known this person all your life and if your lucky, you still know them.
These are the connected ones that allow you to be you, while lifting you up and learning together. The soul type ones that are connected and respected and you know your life is enriched with them in it.. usually learning lifetime lessons that you need in order to build upon to have a strong emotional base. Some may say these are the marrying kind… the ones that you want to spend the rest of your life with, the ones that have unconditional love for you and you for them. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.

When it ends: the hard part comes when the purpose is fulfilled. Sometimes, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. Or maybe, just maybe the purpose has been completed and it’s time to move on.
Of course this can be tricky, especially in “love” relationships where emotions tend to run high and cloud our view or when no explanation, for the departure, has been given. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

But if we look back and truly look within, then hopefully we begin to realize that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled and their work is done.
Hopefully, the pain is not too difficult and the loss is not to great….. but just maybe that too is part of the Reason, Season or Lifetime purpose.After all, what does not kill you tends to make you stronger right?

Till Next Time….. Tags: , , , , , , ,

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